Motherhood changed everything for me. I wanted to be the best.
I wanted to be the best I could be in all the roles I played, especially as a mother and as a teacher. I wanted to execute it perfectly. I didn’t realise that perfection is simply unattainable. There is always a better way of doing something. There will always be higher standards set.
My strive to reach perfection led to severe anxiety and eventually to depression. I tried to battle back by dedicating all of myself to motherhood. I believed that in becoming super-mum while simultaneously juggling my career, the depression would lift. Unfortunately, that’s not what happened. Instead, I lost myself in this new identity that I’d created. I couldn’t sleep, felt exhausted to the bone, and often felt like I was on the verge of losing my sanity.
After years, I have realised that my identity surpasses the various roles I play.
Importantly, I realised that I need to take care of myself first. Identity is about fulfilling our needs first. Being comfortable with who we are, what we can become. We can’t allow societal expectations dictate who we are. We can’t base our self-worth by the number of likes attained on social media. No. Let’s just take time to look within, find the light and our purpose from within us. From there, we can reach out to light up the lives of others.
Always remember that there is only one of you in this world. There is nobody else who has the qualities and DNA that you possess. And nobody, not other people or social media, can dictate your values or determine your sense of worth. The world’s definitions of the “acceptable” norms in life mean little to somebody who has identified their higher purpose. So, I’d like you to take a moment to step back and define who you are. Be proud of all that you’ve accomplished and recognise the fact that you’re here to do more than simply exist.